Colt turns 2!

Colt,

Happy Birthday sweet angel!

 

Did you know that your life is an example of God’s love?

In the midst of my very darkest hour there was a little ray of light.

When I wanted to lose hope and get lost in the grief over losing my mother, I could not. There was a baby.

 

There was a baby who needed me to keep it together. There was a baby that begged me to eat and who kept me from drowning  in my sorrow. There was a baby who gave me hope and a future.

In the midst of our grief…God sent a baby….

 

 

You were a light in our darkness, joy in our pain, and a promise that our family would move forward and thrive!

I want you to always know how God has used your life, even before you took your first breath.

 

You were fearfully and wonderfully made, my sweet baby boy!

From the top of your white, blond hair… to the bottom of your dirty, chunky feet… YOU are HIS!

He made you unique!

 

Oh, and ARE you EVER the unique child! You are shy and prefer to be at home. And if you are not at home, you want to be wherever your Daddy is…

You want to sit with him while he watches TV, you want to stare at him as he cuts the grass, and you stand outside the door while he is in the bathroom. You love going to his closet and getting out his shoes…just to see if they fit your feet this time. You cry when he leaves the house and REJOICE when he gets home!

 

 

 

Your laugh is the greatest sound I have ever heard. I wish I could bottle it up and keep it forever. I have never met such a good looking baby boy in my life! The first time I got a good look at you, I remember thinking how handsome you were already.

Your Grandaddy ("Da Da Da") says you are the smartest boy in Georgia ;)! He watches your every move.

I am not sure if you ever will start talking. ..but that does not slow you down. We all know EXACTLY how you are feeling at any moment.

Your sister is your best friend! You two have a blast together.  She adores you and HATES to hear you cry.  She is your biggest defender and I pray it always stays that way.

 

But deep, deep down…everyone knows your heart belongs to your Mommy. We are a team.

 

I am so thankful that Jesus chose me to be your Mom. I can think of no higher honor.

Each moment that I get to pray over your life brings me joy. Oh, and there are A LOT of prayers!

He has used you in a mighty and powerful way already. I cannot imagine what He has in store for your life! I am so thankful to have a front row seat!

I love you Colt Man! You make my heart sing!

Love, Mommy

 

 

 

 

 

Letter to Heaven, Volume 2

(I guess I forgot to publish this! )

Dear Mama,

 Today Eva began Kindergarten! Can you believe it? Weren’t we just in the delivery room? You started singing her “Happy Birthday” trying to get her to make her grand appearance!  I guess you thought that if you started singing she would decide to come out. Nice try…to bad it didn’t work.

No, Eva has always done things her own way in her own time. She is confidant in everything she does and comfortable in her own skin. I sure do hope she stays that way.

She walked into that Kindergarten room like she owned the place. She then gave me a limit to how many pictures I could take and then she quietly asked me to leave. She said, “Mom, I’ve got this!”

Oh Mama, I could have burst into tears right in that room!  I have worries and fears for her. Trusting Jesus with her life is probably one of the hardest things I have ever done. I wonder if you felt the same way the day you went to heaven.  I looked into your eyes and said, “Don’t worry Mama, I’ve got this!”

 This morning I woke up early and prayed. HARD.  I then watched Chad crawl beside Eva in bed and whisper words of encouragement and love to his little angel. Yes Mama, he is still pretty great! Not that you doubted him!

 I let her eat a chocolate muffin for breakfast!  She only ate the top part and gave her banana to Colt! We read over a Bible verse to remind her that God would be walking the halls right beside her! She smiled!

 I cried after I dropped her off. I cried because she was growing up, but mostly I cried because I wish you were here experiencing her life with me.

But God has not forgotten me and He sent some pretty amazing women to call me and listen to this mother's heart. And of course, I have my daddy!

I just wanted you to know. I love you!
Erin
 

 

 

 

One Step Closer

Our journey to become foster parents is still in high gear. Last week we had our first home study.  We hurried around the house to make sure every detail was perfect, every crumb swept up and every toy put away. It is hard for me to describe the emotions that I was feeling. Before our case worker arrived we stopped and prayed as a family. It was a very simple prayer, yet to Chad and I, it was everything.

“Lord, this is us being obedient to you. Let your will be done. Thank you for bringing us this far. We trust you.  Amen”

The visit was powerful. We got to tell the story of how Jesus brought us on this journey. Hearing it from Chad’s lips is a beautiful thing! I got to describe Chad as a husband and father; he got to talk about me as a wife and mother.  There were words of validation and confirmation that we were, in fact, in this together.  

We have no expectations for what this journey holds. All we know is that God wants us in this place. We would love your prayers and encouragement!

We have our second home study tomorrow and then we wait! It could take several months before we know if we are approved.

I would like to share some verses and quotes that I have collected along the way that give me strength in times of doubt. Oh... and in case you were wondering… I do have doubts! EVERY.SINGLE.DAY.

 

If Jesus ever commanded us to do something that He was unable to equip us to accomplish, He would be a liar. And if we make our own inability a stumbling block or an excuse not to be obedient, it means that we are telling God that there is something which He has not yet taken into account. Every element of our own self-reliance must be put to death by the power of God. The moment we recognize our complete weakness and our dependence upon Him will be the very moment that the Spirit of God will exhibit His power. – Oswald Chambers

 

“Now the God of Peace, who raised Jesus from the dead, will equip you in every good thing to do His will, working in us that which is pleasing in His sight, and HE will get the glory.” Hebrews 13:21

 

“Now to Him who is ABLE to do far more abundantly than we could ever ask or imagine…To Him be the glory! Ephesians 3:20

 

"God's call on your life, what He's asking you to surrender to right now in this season, means that He has chosen you above anyone else to do what He's asking. You are the one He singled out as His partner for a particular project. Whether it's parenting a special needs child (hello), starting a Bible Study, or even, like Jonah, reaching out to people you'd rather avoid, He's purposefully given you the high honor of being the one He deemed suited for a task with heavenly implications.

A supernatural outcome waits on the horizon for anyone who chooses to partner with God. So go ahead, sit on the edge of your seat in anticipation and accept the interruption as the GIFT that it is.

God offers you a chance to write a story of eternal significance, and it all begins...with an interruption."

PRACILLA SHIRER “Jonah”

 

“Do not withhold good from those to whom it is due, when it is in your power to do it!

Proverbs 3:27

 

See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert

and streams in the wasteland.

Isaiah 43:19

 

“The harvest is plenty but the workers are few.”

Mathew 9:37

 

Is God calling you to a new task? Has He been pounding at your door? Ask him to show you what that looks like for you. He is patiently waiting for you to answer His calling on your life! I am praying that you find it!

Love, Erin